Before I start this update, I want to apologize for not providing one earlier. The last couple of months have been a whirlwind of activity…one moment I am saying my final goodbyes to family and friends and the next moment I am wrapping up the first quarter of teaching English to my 6th-12th grade Guatemalan students. (The irony of grammatical and spelling mistakes in this update is not lost to me… I never said I was the best English teacher in the world haha)

As mentioned above, the last few months have been a blur. In a span of 3 months I: resigned from my position at Cal Poly San Luis Obispo, returned to Guatemala, started a new position as an English teacher, and moved into my first solo apartment. Admittedly, it was a bit of a rocky start for a number of reasons: gastrointestinal issues, imposter syndrome, and general uncertainty / fear of the future. (I have turned down a career position working for the state of California and having graduate school paid for not once but twice now…so of course my initial decision of quitting my role at Cal Poly kept me up at night during my first month back.) 

I won’t go too much into detail about the reasons listed above. I do not think anyone wants to hear about how I paid a small fortune for triple ply toilet paper as I knew fully well the changes my body would face. Nor do I think anyone wants to hear about the imposter syndrome that occurs when one starts a new position. (If I am being realistic the imposter syndrome, I felt in my first few days as a teacher was laughable compared to what I felt during my first 6 months working for Cal Poly during the height of the pandemic and or the first 6 months as an Admissions Counselor working for Stan State fresh outta undergrad.)

But what I will touch upon is the uncertainty I had returning to Guatemala. The pandemic has been a wild ride for all of us. Some of us lost loved ones, others had to put our lives on hold, and a select few were instantly ripped from places they called home and sent back to an alien chaotic world known as their “home of record”. These select few were of course Peace Corps Volunteers.

If I am being honest having to deal with evacuation and the year / year and a half that followed was one of the worst experiences of my life. I would constantly think about my Peace Corps site and the friends (to be honest family) that I had to abruptly leave behind. This experience left me with a sense of dread and constant panic attacks at night. Little by little I moved on and learned to process my traumatic experience. 

Flash forward to June of this year when I got the opportunity to return to Guatemala just for a quick visit. I meant to write an update then, but I opted not to. That visit in June was much needed closure for me. I was able to finally get closure for my Peace Corps Service and the life I was forced to walk away from. I was okay with the fact that I would never return to finish my Peace Corps service. (I held on for over a year ready and willing to return) For the first time since the pandemic started, I was at peace with myself. This feeling of bliss became evident with everyone around me. My supervisor even pointed out during our virtual staff meetings that it looked like a “great sadness / loss had been lifted off my shoulders”. In many ways she was correct.

However, while I felt at peace with obtaining closure for the end of my Peace Corps Service, a part of wanted to return to Guatemala and try to rebuild the life I left behind. The opportunity for that presented itself at one of the local international schools near my site and I took it. In many ways my life is better now than it was when I was in the Peace Corps. I earn more as a teacher here than I did as a PC volunteer, I have a better social life, and I have my very own apartment with a gorgeous view of Lago Atitlan. 

While things are technically better….the reality is I cannot help but to feel an ever present sadness for the life I left behind. Ergo, while I got closure for my PC service, I often wonder what my life would be if the pandemic had never happened. If I am being honest there is a sharp difference between being a PCV and living and working as an expat in another country. The difference is as a PCV you are living and working in extremely disenfranchised communities where your efforts can spark ripples of change. Whereas most expats live and work in communities that are far more first world friendly and have access to greater resources or opportunities. 

While I personally enjoy my new position, (well I may not 100% enjoy teaching English, but I do enjoy teaching) and my newfound life in Guatemala, I cannot help but to think that I could be doing much more to create “ripples of change”. This thinking has led me to another crossroads in life. On the one hand I know that I want to spend my life in the classroom teaching history, but in the other I want to be a part of the change the transforms and lifts Latino America and ensures that my fellow Latinos have the educational, economic, and social opportunities to lift themselves out of poverty without being forced to flee from the region. 

This is where the uncertainty and or fear of the future arises. Both options are great, however the former is the more stable of the two, but the latter is the one that currently interests me the most. The reality is…as a first generation Mexican-American, regardless of what I choose I am “damned if I do, damned if I don’t.” Neither one of these options is lucrative, as a child of immigrant parents we are conditioned to make money as we can do so in the United States…this conditioning is the source of said uncertainty and or fear. Failing to live up to this expectation, is a fear that many first-generation Americans face.

While I do not agree with said conditioning, in truth said thinking is admirable and showcases the idea of the American Dream: “The American dream is the belief that anyone, regardless of where they were born or what class they were born into, can attain their own version of success in a society in which upward mobility is possible for everyone.” And while there are many that claim the American Dream is no longer possible, the reality is that there are millions of immigrants in the United States that not only politely disagree but achieve it every day. In the end this be idea of the “American dream” ergo: anyone regardless of race or class can have the opportunity of upward mobility. That drove my parents to immigrate to the United States is the same idea that has brought me to Central America…. the major difference is that I want to use my experience and skills to ensure that my fellow Latinos have the opportunity of upward mobility here in Latin America. 

Whether or not I do that by teaching or by working in International Development is still up in the air. In the end I will choose the option that will make me happiest. And in the words of Macklemore: “The quickest way to happiness learning to be selfless.”

Hi! I hope everyone is doing well and keeping safe! It has been a little over 6 months since Peace Corps Volunteers were evacuated from their country of service due to the COVID-19 Pandemic. The last 6 months have been a wild emotional ride for myself, other volunteers, and the world. I decided to post a quick little update for anyone following this blog.

The last 6 months have not been easy. I went from living in a community I happily called home, having a great job, and enjoying my newfound life in a new country to being sent back to my home of record. The transition has not been an easy one. Upon arriving to the United States, I quickly made my way to a prepaid Motel 6 in a very questionable part of my home of record. Evacuated volunteers were recommended to self-isolate for two weeks upon arrival. (The risk of transmitting the virus was going to be high considering we were cooped up with a bunch of volunteers and traveled through multiple airports)

Those two weeks in a motel 6 were very interesting… as I watched the mad scramble for toilet paper and other supplies on CNN during the day and listened to the ladies of the night loudly exclaim they were only seeing “5 customers per night” to lower their risk of catching the Corona Virus; two things became increasingly clear: I was safer in my site and its going to be a long time before I can return to Guatemala and or my Peace Corps Service.

My personal safety was my biggest concern upon arriving to the States. Partly because of the Corona Virus and mostly because of where I would have to self-isolate. I did not have the privilege to self-isolate with my parents or family as everyone in my immediate family was at risk. I settled for the local motel 6 as it was close to my parents’ home and I did not have any other choice. The area where the motel 6 is located is plagued by poverty, drug dealers, drug users, prostitution, and violence. (A couple of weeks before I arrived some one was killed in the local parking lot…. Normally this wouldn’t concern me but couple that with someone pounding at your door at 1AM and it’s a pretty surreal experience) None of this stuff was new to me. I grew up around it… At that point in time I found it ironic that weeks before evacuation I was politely listening  to volunteers rant about poverty in the United States and the experiences of Low-socioeconomic status individuals they had read in college textbooks or learned in University classes and here I was weeks later facing that reality… a reality I grew up in. Life is wild.

The months following my self quarantine were by far the worst. While it was great connecting with family and friends the reality was that I was very much unemployed. In this country that is a major “No-No” as your identity, sense of worth, and more importantly your wellbeing is tied to your job (Healthcare). As some one who’s been working since they were 16 being unemployed sucked. I did my best to pick up hobbies, exercise, and link up with friends…but those things are hard during a pandemic, while trying to adjust to U.S. Life and while mourning the evacuation. Some days were easy but most days were hard. The last 6 months have been a whirl wind of mundane inactivity with some highlights and many sleepless nights sprinkled in.

One of those highlights is that I no longer feel as lost as I did 6 months ago. The other highlight is that I landed a new full-time job in my field: Higher Education (a field hit hard by the pandemic) and I once again will be serving students.

I wish I had more to add but I do not. Every day feels largely the same. A “whirl wind of mundane inactivity” corona cases and deaths keep rising, protests are still happening, the entire west coast is on fire and the rest of the world watches in horror. If you want a potential solution to the problems above I highly suggest voting in the upcoming election. (If you are able to do so) The changes wont happen over night but a simple vote can get the cogs of the bureaucratic machine moving to eventually address the issues listed above.

Any who that is all for now. I do not know if I will write another update at a later time. I just saw it fitting to write one considering its been 6 months since being evacuated and it is the eve of my 27th Birthday (or this might actually be posted on my birthday). I originally made this blog to provide updates of my Peace Corps experience…. I do not know what will happen in life but I do know one thing though: Should I be given the opportunity to serve again I will not only do it in a heartbeat, but I will do a much better job of documenting my experience through a written blog, pictures, and videos. Primero Dios.

Evacuation:

Hello there! As many of you may already know, Peace Corps volunteers all over the world were evacuated due to the Corona Virus Pandemic. Some of you might be asking what exactly does being “evacuated” mean? In a nutshell: we are being sent back to our home of records and are being granted a Close of Service…ergo due to the pandemic we have fulfilled our service. While many back home may be happy to see us return, the reality is that this has been a traumatic heart breaking experience for us to endure. I can only speak for myself in this blog post…but the growing consensus amongst the Peace Corps Volunteers is that: “We are straight up not having a good time.” This evacuation has hit us all differently, I will do my best to document my experience and the days leading up to the event. But please understand that if you know a volunteer please do not try to invalidate their feelings or try to find the “silver lining” of this event for them. Please give us time to process what we are experiencing. Many of us, myself included, are still coming out of shock. We were pulled from our lives, our homes, our loved ones and were sent back to the United States in a moments notice. Many of us did not get a chance to say goodbye to those that we care about. Some of us left our sites with only the clothes on their back and nothing else. All of us chose to serve our Host Country for 27 months of service….our service was cut short.

This time last week (March 13, 2020) I was in my site, planning my classes for the following week. I was looking through a lesson plan covering the Corona Virus that I wanted to teach in my classes. (And provide preventative measures to my students) At this point in time there was a lot of tension in the air due to the virus. Nobody really knew what was going on or what was about to happen. That evening I ran out to do some shopping and grab some dinner. As soon as I sat down to eat said dinner the President of Guatemala provided an update on the Corona virus situation. At that point in time, there was only 1 confirmed case in the country. He told everyone to stay calm, that there would be no restrictions in country, to go out and enjoy life, and to not buy all the toilet paper….Within 24 hours the situation escalated drastically.

On Saturday afternoon, (March 14, 2020) the President issued that all schools be shut down for 3 weeks. He mentioned several other warnings and restrictions, U.S. Citizens being banned from entering Guatemala for instance, but this is the only one that really affected me. (My Schools were closed) I immediately rushed home to my host family as I knew things were going to get worse. That night we received an email from our Country Director saying that the Peace Corps globally was offering volunteers the option to take “Interrupted Service” an option where you could end your service and reinstate at a later time should the global situation improve. At that moment I decided that I would do whatever it takes to stay in Guatemala. I told some of my host family that night what the situation was. Little did I know that things would get worse.

On Sunday afternoon, (March 15, 2020) we received word that our global director was suspending Peace Corps operations globally and evacuating all volunteers. Shit at this point really did hit the fan. My entire whatsapp group chat filled with other PCVS lit up like the 4^th of July. We had no idea what exactly a global evacuation entailed. Our Country Director gave us additional information a couple hours later. My department was to evacuate that following Tuesday. That night I spoke to my host dad and told him the situation. My host family already started seeing the affects of the Corona virus as all travel from Europe and the U.S. had been cancelled….my host dad, a tourist driver, had 5 trips into the capital cancelled.

That night I started to pack up my room and decided to pack my essentials only. Whatever I left behind I wanted my host family to keep and use should they need it as realistically I did not know when I would return or if I would return. That night I got a couple hours of sleep and made the decision to run the last of my errands the following day and say goodbye to my host family, friends, and coworkers I had made in site.

Monday March 16, 2020 was a very sad day. I told my host sisters Carmen and Manuela first what was going on. This came as a shock to them as I had expressed multiple times that I would do my best to stay. To my initial surprise I broke down to them. Guatemala is a country dominated by machismo, a man showing vulnerability or emotions like I did is extremely rare and out of character. Through my tears I told them multiple times that I didn’t want to leave. That I wanted to stay, this was my home, I was happy here…After I regained my composure I headed out of town to run some errands and say good bye to my friend the tuk tuk driver.

When I got home I decided to track down my other two host sisters to say good bye. My Host sister Imelda works in the towns cultural center. When I told her that I was leaving we both broke down and cried. She was the first one in the family that took me in when I got to site. She is a strong, kind, caring woman that always made sure I was doing okay.

I asked if she could take me to see my other host sister Nicolasa. When we got to my host sisters house we were greeted by my host niece Estrella. She ran to get her mom when she saw that we were both crying. I told Nicolasa that I was leaving and once again broke down. Like Imelda, Nicolasa was the second host sister that took me in. She is an extremely kind, confident, independent woman. Over the last few months she became my favorite host family member as we would always sit down and talk and share our life experiences. (She is also 26, married and has an extremely funny daughter).

After I said my goodbye, I decided to walk around my community one last time. I truly feel that I was blessed with the best site, family, socios and students. I do not know when I will return to Guatemala, but when I do, I am going to fight to return to my site and host family. After walking around the site and admiring the view of Lago Atitlan one last time, I got the opportunity to have one last English class with three of my students. Seeing and interacting with them really lifted my spirits and reinforced my decision to return to Guatemala… I am happy that I was able to see them before I left…30 minutes after our class I got the TEXT to evacuate from site and meet other volunteers in our consolidation point. My time in my community was cut short, I am happy and blessed that I was able to spend one last morning/ afternoon in my site. There are several volunteers that were pulled out from their sites that morning and did not have a chance to say goodbye to their loved ones.

My host dad took me to the consolidation point and gave me a big hug and told me he was expecting my return. I am thankful for him and my host step mom. My regret is that I did not spend as much time with them as I should have. After waiting in our consolidation point for Peace Corps Volunteers and Staff we were sent to a hotel near the Peace Corps Office.

Peace Corps Hotel

After a two hour drive from our Department we finally made it to the Peace Corps Hotel. We believed that we would be flown out that night or the next day. We were wrong….we would be flown out Wednesday afternoon… After getting to the Hotel I ran to give my site mate Alexandra a hug. She has been my rock since I got to site and one of my best friends in country. I also caught up and hugged the volunteers who were there from my cohort. The Peace Corps did not put all 169 volunteers in one hotel. We were spread around 3 hotels around Sacatepequez. A number of us were divided between different cohorts. My hotel hosted people from my cohort (volunteers who were in country for 6 months), 1^st year and 2^nd year volunteers. We also had the new batch of trainees in our hotel. For me personally it was my first time not only meeting all the volunteers in my beautiful department of Solola, but it was my first time meeting the bulk of volunteers staying with us. As volunteers we were all experiencing similar feelings: sadness, grief, anger, despair… (the list goes on) Our energy levels were on a completely different level compared to the trainees who had just arrived in country. We all felt defeated…for me personally waves of sadness would hit me over the next few days. I found myself crying to either Alex or my Kan (cohort) mates. I saw so much solidarity amongt volunteers in the Hotel. This solidarity has also been shown to us by Returned Peace Corps Volunteers country wide who are providing us with much needed support. (By us I mean all 8000 volunteers who were sent home) The bulk of my time in the hotel I spent it with Alex and a small group of volunteers from her cohort. We did our best to cope. (Shout out to the Megabed we made and baby shark) I also got the chance to convivir with members of the new cohort. They are super sweet and caring people, I am hoping to see them once again in country once this mess is resolved.

Sometime between Tuesday and Wednesday we were given word that a police escort would be taking us to the Airport. A few days before the Guatemalan President Shut down all flights in and out of Guatemala. In addition, he shut down all public transport. When I left to my consolidation point I was only able to grab 1 bag as I was told that they might shut down the main road between my site and the consolidation point. (I literally left Guatemala with the clothes on my back) The Presidents restrictions made it difficult to mobilize volunteers and get them out. While it was frustrating for us we understood that it was for the safety of the Guatemalan people.

While we were waiting to leave, I was angry that we were being pulled out. Like I stated before I did not want to leave, my site is my home, Guatemala has become my home. My Country Director said something to us that stuck with me and helped me accept the Peace Corps decision: “The last thing we want is for an American Citizen/ Peace Corps Volunteer to get sick and take up space and or a bed in a Guatemalan hospital that could have gone to a Guatemalteco.” Should I have stayed and something happened to me I would be doing a disservice to the Guatemaltecos… I could not live with that.

Wednesday afternoon we found ourselves mobilizing into shuttles. We were escorted to the capital by a police escort. Our flight was only approved by the Guatemalan Government because we would be flying at risk U.S. Embassy Staff. Upon arriving to the airport we were able to meet up with the rest of the 169 Volunteers/ Trainees. I hugged everyone in my cohort as this took a toll on all of us. I was able to spend the rest of my time in country as we were waiting to board with my cohort “family” and making calls to my host families, socios, and host country friends.

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Later that night we finally arrived to Miami….if I am being honest by this point in time I was exhausted (we were all exhausted) I believe between Monday and Thursday I only got 4 to 6 hours of sleep in total. Upon arriving in Miami we ubered to our Hotel, got dinner, and spent our last hours together with our PCV groups. (I hung out with my cohort family before getting a couple of hours of sleep) Later that morning, me and my site mate Alex headed off to the airport to catch our flight to LAX. Upon arriving to LAX I had to double check with my parents to make sure they found me a secure place for me to stay for two weeks. All Peace Corps Volunteers have been told to self quarantine for two weeks. Both my parents are at risk and I am happy and grateful that they found me a place to stay in such short notice….I spent the rest of that day waiting in LAX for my Flight back to Fresno and later my Uber to Merced….

Quarantine/ Reverse Culture Shock

Being Self-Quarantined is not that bad. Site entry prepared all volunteers for this. I am used to being alone and being by myself. The biggest difference here is that I have access to unlimited 4G internet on my phone. The huge out pour of support from the Returned Peace Corps Community has been overwhelming and much needed. The Peace Corps staff did their best to get us out of country and into the United States…however a lot of things are still up in the air as to what will happen with us and our service. Like I said we have all been COSed…that looks a little different for everyone as does reinstatement into our host countries. We do not know when we will be able to return. A lot of things are still up in the air and all we can do is wait for further clarification and instructions. In the short time that I have been in quarantine a lot of things have shocked me.

Upon arriving in Miami I had a very jarring exchange with a Cuban Uber driver. It was nothing bad but I was very much use to Guatemalan Spanish and mannerisms. In my experience Guatemalans are very calm and reserved individuals and are always “siempre a la orden.” My Uber driver was very animated and very direct with me… it was not an experience that I needed to process upon arriving to the United States. In addition to this in LAX interacting with individuals from Spain was something that I was not ready for. Their Spanish was faster and somewhat challenging to follow. It was also extremely jarring seeing the vast amount of wealth piled into one airport. It is my honest opinion that no one should be spending hundreds and or thousands of dollars on designers bags or watches when there are people the world over struggling to survive….people in our very own country struggling to survive…but that is a conversation for another day.

The Future:

I am not sure what the future holds. I do know one thing though… I will return to Guatemala. I fell in love with the country, people, and culture. I have decided it is where I want to live my life. I am not sure when I will be able to do it. I am ready to return to the Peace Corps when ever they are back up and running. I will fight tooth and nail for my site, host family, work partners, and students. My Project Managers know this and await my return. I will also do my best to return as soon as possible even if it is without the Peace Corps. My current plan is to figure out my life here in the states…and return on my own accord to teach English in my site if the Peace Corps takes a while to continue operations. Many people that I have talked to are giving the Peace Corps 6 months to get things up and running. If it does not happen, they will walk away as they cannot wait any longer. I personally realized that my plans to obtain my Graduate Degree and Doctorates can wait/ can be done later. This is what I want out of life. I will gladly return to serve the Guatemalan people for an additional 27 months of service and happily extend for an additional year after that.

In closing Guatemala has been very good to me. Evacuation has been one of the most traumatic experiences of my life. I am still in shock and will have to process and unpack what I have been through in the coming weeks and or months. I miss my site, host family, socios and students. I am looking forward to seeing them again.

Hello friends it is time for an update! I am going to keep it real and admit that I am terrible at blogging. I don’t think this will change. I am far more active on Facebook or Instagram.

For things first: “The content of this website is mine alone and does not necessarily reflect the views of the U.S. Government, the Peace Corps, or the Guatemalan Government.”

I’ve been in Guatemala for almost 6 months now. It’s been a wild ride that admittedly has gone by in a blink of an eye. It’s true what they say, “the days are long, but the weeks fly by.” I will do my best to break this post down into various parts.

The Peace Corps

The Peace Corps itself has been a mixed bag for me. The Guatemalan staff and the staff who have served have been great. They have been a great resource and are extremely supportive. The rules we adhere to makes my life far more challenging than it needs to be. But such is life.

On that note I have met some nice people in the Peace Corps. I have a handful of close friends within my Kan (the group I came in with) and I have met some lovely volunteers in the department I am serving. For the sake of my mental and emotional health I have decided to maintain a 9 to 5 relationship with most volunteers. I realized that it is best for me to invest time in those who invest time in me. This has done wonders for me personally. However, with that being said I am always there for anyone who needs help or just wants to get a coffee.

Guatemala

Guatemala has been great to me. I’ve lost a ton of weight, I’m exercising, eating better and meeting incredible people. Guatemala is a beautiful country, with hard working, caring people who are striving for a better tomorrow. The news back home does not do this country justice and that saddens me. In the future I will like to talk more about this and hopefully start a video blog series.

Working in Guatemala

Work culture is both similar and different than the states. Sometimes we open a meeting with a blessing. Other times we end a meeting with a bible passage. Sometimes a meeting will start on time. Other times it will start an hour late. It has been an interesting professional experience I have learned to go with the flow and just enjoy the company of other Socios. (Work Partners)

I started working and have my own classes. I also work for three local government agencies. One in my site and two in another site I cover.

As a Youth in Development Coordinator (volunteer) my job is to coordinate and work with all the groups that serve the youth. The bulk of my job is doing this, classes/workshops for my project framework, and assisting in any way I can. I work with two offices, in my site I work with the local youth office: Oficina Municipal de la Niñez , Adolescencia y la Juventud and in my secondary site I work with the local youth office: Oficina Municipal de la Niñez , Adolescencia y la Juventud and the women’s office: Dirección Municipal de la Mujer. My Socios (work partners) are new and are planning events. We have planned English classes for youth in my site, and I have assisted in a community wellness fair where I translated for doctors. Currently I am on call but meet with my work partners once a week for work updates and to schedule and plan future events.

As stated, before I am planning English classes for youth in my site. English classes are extremely important for both of my communities, as they are major tourists’ hubs. If I am being honest, I barely have a grasp of the English language myself…. I studied History in college. While I love being in the classroom, teaching English really isn’t my forte. But I got to give the people what they want and I explain to every one that I am not an English teacher but I will do my best. So far it has been a good experience and a fun secondary project….Truth be told it melts my frigid heart when a young child lights up because they learned a new word.

I’m teaching English in my towns cultural center where we teach a total of 20 or so kids. They are all in different language levels, I am helping to teach the advance group. The teachers who run the group are two young university students who are learning English in school. I do my best to be of service. It works out great because I help them with pronunciation, and they give me a much needed crash course in grammar.

My other source of work is my school. I teach Tuesday through Friday. Admittedly I am assisting in English classes Thursday and Friday, but I am giving my own classes for my project framework Tuesday-Thursday during certain periods. I enjoy working with youth and have enjoyed teaching. It’s an interesting dynamic for me as I have been doing it all in Spanish. Truth be told my older classes are a little bit easier. But it is a nightmare to try and manage my first years. I work in a Basico. Here in Guatemala it is a mixture of middle school and high school. My youngest students are 10 to 11 years old while my oldest are 18-19 years old.

My students are indigenous as are my colleagues. Truth be told my students here are no different than my students back home. The only real difference is that they are far kinder and have a little bit more respect for their teachers. (Working in a small school and town helps) they are also teens. They have social media, goof off, crack jokes and gossip. (Oh my god do they gossip!)

Gender roles are very much a thing but so is female empowerment. My female students wear their indigenous dress which is honestly beautiful with vibrant colors and designs. (I think I will make a post regarding traje and weaving in the future!)

Integration

I am slowly integrating with my host family. Its a slow process for me but I have enjoyed sharing time with them. I will hopefully be learning to weave in the coming weeks under the guidance of one of my host sisters. I am hoping to have a strong relationship with them as we continue to move forward. They are amazing and kind individuals and my host sisters never fail to crack me up. There are a lot of children in the family, seeing the smile on their faces when they see me always make my day. (This smile is proceeded by their shouts of “MIGUEL!” or “EL MIGUEL!!!!”)

When it comes to friends, a lot of people know me or know who I am. Outside of a couple of volunteers in my department I don’t have many close friends. I am hoping to work on this as I continue my service. In the mean time I keep cracking jokes with the Tuk Tuk (it would be easier if yall just google it) Drivers in my site. I have a great time talking to them. (I am planning English classes for them as well!)

Hobbies

Does surviving count? I am gonna level with yall I packed a hard drive full of movies, shows and anime and I haven’t watched anything since January. (I think) I am trying to learn guitar in my free time but I have never been the artistic type. I am reading and jogging.  I am trying to explore the other towns near my site with another volunteer. Each lake town we visit has been beautiful and worth the trip!

Moving forward I want to pour more time into running and working out. I also want to start mountain biking and kayaking. But the rainy season is slowly approaching us here so we will see how that goes.

The Future

I am planning to go back to the states in June. Thats going to be a nightmare to navigate. (an expensive one at that) But it will be an interesting break. While it will be great to see friends and family…. I think it will solidify my choice on wanting to stay here an extra year….. Oh yeah if by my intended Close of Service date (Ergo when I get to go home) everything is great back home I am going to extend my service an additional year.

Other

When I start my MA in History or Political Science Program (I am in no hurry to actually start it)…. I want to write my thesis on Femicide and women’s rights in Central America. In also want to do more for female empowerment here in Guatemala.

I have also been navigating my own identity. It is true what they say, you become a different version of yourself when you speak a different language. This has been interesting for me to navigate as a Mexican-American.

Spanish was my first language, but it was not my preferred/ strongest language. I’ve gained a better mastery of Spanish over the last 6 months that I’ve been here but it is a challenge to speak it as my Mexican Spanish/ Mexican Culture/ Attitude/ Accent? comes out. Mexicans are a lot more direct and we are extremely loud and abrasive. (no ill intentions I sure you) I am far more confident speaking in Spanish now and it’s been fun navigating both conversational Spanish and professional Spanish.

A number of people ask me if I am from Guatemala City (the capital) based on how I look. Once I start talking however they start commenting that I am not Guatemalteco and start asking me where I am from…. it has been amusing seeing peoples reactions.

Now that I have been here for 6 months, I am interested in learning more about my Mexican background. It’s going to be a long overdue conversation with my parents regarding my family history.

Final Thoughts

I am happy. Some days are long and draining but I am happy. I am no longer stressed as I was back home. Nor do I feel the sense of dread and or urgency that I felt in the States when I thought about my own future. Being here has given my life meaning…. doing what I love has given my life meaning. Teaching, inspiring students, changing lives. I would not change any of this for the world.

That is not to say I don’t get lonely or feel alone. Sometimes I get hit with the realization that I am 3000 miles away from everyone I know and love. It’s a hard feeling to process. I feel it will be easier to process as I continue to integrate further…. Just have to take it one day at a time.

Till the next update (6 months from now!)

Oh here is a couple of pictures:

Hi guys! I apologize for the delay in providing updates. I took some much needed R & R after I left Stanislaus State Admissions and Outreach Services. (AOS for LIFE!) During that month I spent time with friends, family, and a lot of time gaming, tracking down shows, music, movies, and books. Now I am finally here in Guatemala!

I have been in country for 5 days now. Initially we all met up in Miami for staging. As a California boy from the barrios of the Central Valley the Miami humidity hit me like a bus. I knew it was going to be bad, but not that bad. (I am used to dry heat not 80% humidity lol)  I thanked the heavens that I packed a pair of decent shorts and 2 short sleeve button ups. That night I was able to go out with two volunteer trainees. We talked about life and why we decided to serve in the Peace Corps. We called it an early night as we were excited to see what the next day would hold.

Staging truly is where the fun begins for Pre-Service Training. We finally got to meet the faces that stared at us from our Facebook group page. Individuals from all over the United States, with different experiences and equally different backgrounds. I was nervous, excited but overall, I knew that I was in the right place in my life. Truth be told I was a little intimidated by this group of interesting people. There is a saying that goes a little along the lines of “If you are the smartest person in the room you are in the wrong room”. I always felt that the opposite was just as true. I felt like the dumbest person in the room therefore I was in the right room! (this notion of being in the right place will be a bit of a theme for this blog… you will all see why lol)

After staging we were able to breakout for dinner where I got to know more of these incredible individuals. It makes me happy to say that I have friends from just about every facet of the United States and even a couple from outside the U.S.! Getting to know these individuals is extremely important for me… ergo… I would go as far to say that it is important for all of us trainees as they will be our family for the next 27 months of service. They will be the people who will understand exactly what we are going through.

Before we knew it we landed in Guatemala. The Peace Corps received us with open arms. They set us up in a hotel that had incredible views of the Volcan de Fuego. (Which we were able to see in action after our training days) Each morning we walked from the hotel to the Peace Corps Office. This short walk gave us a glimpse to a small slice of Guatemalan life. School children walking to catch their bus to school, store owners opening up their shops to embrace a new day, carniceros (butchers) cutting up and selling meat, taqueroes making tacos and cooking chicharrones, and multiple tortilleria owners working hard making tortillas hecha mano. (Tortillas made by hand) I can only speak for myself but I felt at home with everything I saw. I fully understand that Guatemala has a unique culture, history and people. But for me as a Mexican American everything I saw was similar to my life back home in the barrios of Merced, California and equally similar to my parents life in Michoacan, Mexico. For me this made me very happy. These were aspects of my life that I loved back home, it reinforced my belief that I am where I need to be in life.

Our first 5 days in country were composed of trainings, lectures, and several activities. Initially it was a little overwhelming but we quickly adapted. We got to meet the entirety of the Peace Corps staff that will be working with us for our Pre-Service Training and several volunteers. (This individuals are equally amazing and have served as a great source of wisdom for my first couple of days in country) For the record my third day in country is vastly different than those of my colleagues. I wont get too much into it in this blog post for reasons that I will cover at a later time. (Which I am sure at that point in time you will all laugh and agree that I made the right move lol…trust me it was nothing bad)

But my fellow colleagues do know what occurred and so do 3 friends back home. (I appreciate you guys for everything!) but what I can say is that I grew a lot more as a person on my 3^rd day in country than I had in the last 6 months. This unexpected growth has prepared me for my service. I can also say that at the end of that long day my new found friends joined me in a unforgettable rendition of “I want it that way” by the backstreet boys in our evening talent show. It was a memorable event.  

Any who I am rambling.  These last couple of days have been the most exciting. We met our host families yesterday. It was a super neat experience as my host mother is super kind and understanding. Now remember when I said everything happens for a reason? My host dad has the same birthday as me! (October 3) I have a 20 year old host sister and a 17 year old host brother. Back home I have a 20 year old brother and a 17 year old sister. These are some crazy coincidences (among others) and to me it seems like I am exactly where I need to be in this point of my life.

Any who, Guatemala has been incredible thus far. The parts of the country I have seen so far are breathtakingly beautiful. (Seriously, I get to look at 3 volcanoes while I do my laundry!) The Guatemalan people I have met have been compassionate, kind and have made me feel at home.

In the following blog post I am hoping to discuss my experience in my host community for Pre-Service Training, the nature of my job, and interesting topics that we touch upon in our Peace Corps training session.

Adios!